Hi Moms! Lately, I’ve been hearing from a lot of moms that they have felt so unsettled lately. They’ve expressed ongoing anxiety or a sense of doom.
I get it. I’ve had these same feelings. As moms of autistics, we work extra hard to protect our children from the unique challenges they face on top of typical child-related challenges.
We are surrounded by daily horror stories from all corners of the world. Seasoned therapists often experience PTSD from repeatedly hearing stories over the years of trauma and devastation.
Think about that for a minute. There is a lot going on around the world right now. When you have experienced extraordinary, repeated situations in your own life, you are more likely to feel the heaviness of what others are experiencing around you.
In this episode, I explore ways to protect yourself from overwhelming circumstances to minimize the long-term effects on you and your child.
Find the full transcript for this episode at http://thrivingmomsofautistics.com/50
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Navigating the Chaos as an Autism Mom
I’m just going to jump right into this today. Because we all know why this is important, right? So, I don’t need to examine that.
Being surrounded by so much that is out of one’s control and can take a toll on anyone. No one is exempt from that.
You know yourself best. However, you might miss key warning signs if you’re not paying close attention. It’s a chaotic time after all.
Moms of autistics juggle a lot of balls day after day. One might think it’s impossible to catch everything as a result. However, autism moms tend to have a heightened sense of awareness that works in everyone’s favor.
Unfortunately, they tend to place themselves at the end of the line when it comes to attention. Yes, I’m talking about you! We all have done it.
Tips for Autism Moms to Achieve Peace
Tip #1 Set Boundaries: Moms of autistics lead pretty structured lives given the uncertainty of our days. We live in a technological era. The news is everywhere. It is hard to get away from it.
Sometimes, you must unplug. I keep my phone on all the time when I am not with my son in case his teachers or therapists need me. Like you, I can never completely unplug. But I can decide what I read and watch.
This might mean you need to take a break from the news. That is a trigger waiting to happen. Nothing good comes from the news usually.
It is good to be informed to some extent, but it can have a big impact on you with repeated exposure. This includes social media. Many get their news through social media. Also, it is not a realistic place. I think of it as wonderland, or the land of what others want you to see.
I can’t tell you how many people have told me they took a break from social media for a few days and the difference it made in their lives.
I use social media for marketing but can definitely minimize my use on a daily basis.
Here is a challenge for the week to come. Are you ready? Track how often and how long you are on social media for a 2–3-day period. You might be surprised by the results.
Tip #2 Be Mindful of Your Energy Source: Have you ever heard of garbage in garbage out? What you put into your body matters. Our food and drink options serve as an energy source for our bodies.
I had a meeting earlier today with a friend developing a business about gut health. All I could think about was how my belly hurt from eating too much candy earlier in the day. The sad thing was that it was only 11am. But I was feeling stressed. Needless to say, the candy didn’t help.
I know better and could have dealt with my stress in a healthier way. We all make mistakes, right?
When you fill your body with healthy options, you have a healthier response. You sleep better, feel less tired, and have less brain fog so you can overcome the challenges of the day with less resistance.
It also matters what you fill your mind with. I notice that my mood is impacted by the music I listen to, the people I surround myself with, and on and on.
This includes what you tell yourself. We sometimes believe the lies we tell ourselves or that others feed us. I’m not good enough. I can’t learn. I’ll never be like so and so.
Stop comparing yourself. Don’t allow others to bring you down. Stop the stinking thinking! And put down that Coke or candy! Lol! Turn it around. Only YOU can! You’ve got the power!
Tip #3 Meet Yourself Where You Are At: If you’re scared or overwhelmed, acknowledge it. Find a safe space or a safe person, who cares about you and tell them.
I know what you are thinking. I have yet to find someone who gets me and my situation. I don’t have the time to do that. I lost my friends when I became a mom. I don’t get along with my family.
Safe people and safe spaces actually exist if you know where to look. Of course, what works for one doesn’t work for all. You must find a good fit for you.
I found an organization in Indianapolis that serves women locally and nationally. Their goal is to provide a safe space for women to express themselves and heal together. They listen to one another without judgement and encourage one another.
It’s called Purposeful Living. It is faith based but you don’t have to share the same beliefs. They genuinely meet you where you are at. I love their 8-week groups twice a year and various events. This is just one option.
Some social media groups for parents of children with special needs are good. Occasionally, you might find one that is not super healthy or helpful. But there are good ones out there where you might meet others who are supportive. It’s okay to be choosy.
Ultimately, you know what you need. It usually won’t find you, although it might. You need to seize the day and take control. If anyone can, it’s an autism mom!
I hope this helps!
Let’s meet again next week!