Hi Moms! I had a conversation recently with a group of women about mental health and trauma. Someone added to the conversation that we don’t heal alone. We heal in the presence of others. That’s how we were made. What a great point!
Modern society tells us that we can do it all ourselves and should take pride in that, which might contribute to the greater levels of depression and anxiety we are all experiencing at this time in history.
Women need to feel connected. They flourish in the right supportive environment. This is hard to do because some groups can be toxic, which makes us run from others and seek independence.
Have you had that experience? I think we all have at some point, whether in childhood, adolescence, or even adulthood. The point is that you can feel supported in the right environment.
In this episode, I explore how building supports can change the trajectory of your path and recharge your battery as a mom of an autistic.
Find the full transcript for this episode at www.thrivingmomsofautistics.com/39
Please share the podcast with other moms to help them grow in their autism journey. You can also do this by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. I appreciate you!
Taking the Independent Path as an Autism Mom
Everyone has bumps in the road in their journey. Unfortunately, life is not a smooth path. Moms of autistics know this all too well.
It can be isolating because our experiences as moms are quite different from others. It’s hard for those to understand, who have not had those same experiences. Although people often try, that’s normal.
This is one reason why moms of autistics isolate themselves. It’s hard to explain what we are going through, especially when it comes to the unique challenges often that we face.
Our triumphs seem miniscule to others, but for us that milestone was a long time coming, which makes it that much sweeter. It’s a beautiful thing to have someone to celebrate those victories with.
Another reason why moms of autistics isolate themselves is because it takes a lot of energy to explain or try to help others understand their situation. Does that mean others won’t understand? Of course not. Everyone is different.
In the past, I’ve talked about opportunities to educate others in moments of difficulty. Sometimes, people are closed off to understanding, which is their loss. Move on from it. Don’t take on that additional stress. You don’t need it. It has nothing to do with you. It’s about them.
Most often, it lightens the load and brings us together. Further allowing us to come together when things get hard again, and they will. That’s life!
We all have challenges. We just have different challenges.
Making the Transition to Share Your Autism Journey with Others
It’s not easy to decide to switch gears and open yourself and your situation up to others. I thought I was fully equipped to do it all on my own.
My husband was supportive, but we didn’t have anyone in our inner circle. We were too busy making sure our son had everything he needed in terms of growth, therapy, and milestones.
We were wrong. Our son needed others in his life that understood and were supportive just as much as we did. We learned the hard way when we both had back-to-back medical emergencies within a two-month period.
The Benefit of Running on a Full Charge as a Mom of an Autistic
One obvious benefit is that you have others to bounce ideas off of. They might have different experiences with their autistic loved one but can appreciate the challenge.
It is powerful to have someone listen to you and try to understand. They don’t have to fix it for us. But we need others to empathize and love us through it. That is a great start to recharging your battery. Otherwise, you just marinate in it, which leads to worry and negative thoughts when you isolate.
Sometimes, we just need to bounce ideas off one another. We are so involved in our own situation that it is hard to see the full picture. It might take someone else to point out what we missed. There really is power in numbers.
Gaining a supportive community is good for when emergencies pop up. You need people who have a relationship with your child. Anything can happen at any given time. As autism parents, we need to have someone that can jump at the last minute if needed.
My life is so different now that I have built a supportive community. We have been there for one another during emergencies, births, loss, and some of the hardest times and happiest times of our lives.
I remember when we did not go to other people’s house for fear of behaviors, meltdowns, property destruction, and you name it.
Our small community of families no longer fear these things. We do not judge one another. We meet each other where we are and love each other through it.
We recharge our batteries together and we heal and grow together. I challenge you to think about where you are and what steps you can take to grow a supportive community.
It is possible. I have seen it time and time again.
I am so happy you are here. You are not alone. Let’s meet again next week.